Friday, January 30, 2009

Get Back Together With Ex Don’t Write Off the Relationship Just Because She Dumped You

Do you want to get back together with ex? Don’t write off the relationship just because she dumped you.

Women are fickle creatures. In 3 out of every 4 break ups, it is the woman who calls it off. But, many times they’re open to re-establishing the relationship. Breaking up may not have been a well thought out decision, but they are loathe to admit they are wrong and come back to you themselves.

Part of your job is to figure out what went wrong and change it. If she was bored in the relationship, you need to spice things up. If she was looking for a flashier guy, a makeover might be in order. And, if you were too needy, you might just need to back off for a time.

Right now, if you want to get back together with ex, you need to show her that you are exactly the kind of guy she wants to date.

One of the ways to get back together with ex is to show her that you are an in demand kind of guy. Every girl says she wants to be unique. They look for “unique” styles. But you will quickly notice that what they really want is a “unique” look that is just like all of their friends’ looks.

So, to become the in-demand guy, you have to start dating in-demand girls. In fact, dating her close friends will actually make her want to get back together with you.

If you are uncomfortable dating people who might continue to be in your life after you get back together with your ex, you can at least flirt with them. When you see your ex with a pack of her friends, don’t pay any attention to her. Instead, lavish attention on her friends. If she has a particularly plain friend, spend the most time with her. That’s one way to get back together with ex.

Look at how she reacts to you when other guys are around. When someone puts you down, does she stand up for you? That is a good sign that she is still into you and will welcome you back into her life.

When you want to get back together with ex, you need to realize that there is a new power relationship at play. You no longer belong to each other exclusively. Instead, you are two independent spheres rotating around the other.

Many guys don’t realize that this power shift has occurred. While they are down in the dumps about the break up, they don’t change their behavior pattern toward their ex. This is a big mistake.

When you want to get back together with ex, you will take advantage of the shift in power. You will woo her by changing the things that she doesn’t like about you or the relationship, become the in-demand guy that all girls want to date, and be a little bit unavailable to her. If these things don’t work, she probably has moved on and you won’t have much hope of jump starting anything.

However, in almost all cases, because women are fickle creatures, you can get back together with ex...!.(more....)

Friday, January 23, 2009

Boyfriend Break Up Is It Possible to Get Ex Back

Did your boyfriend break up with you? This is a rough time in your life. You are probably hurting and want to know what caused your boyfriend break up.

First of all, while you can use this time to look at yourself and where you are in your life, don’t do too much introspection. The truth behind why your boyfriend break up with you is that he had his own issues. You know what they say, “it’s not you, it’s me.”

You can spend time trying to get your ex back. If you are going to go down this route, you need to know the following things:

· Don’t pester your ex – when your boyfriend break up with you, it meant that you have more limited access to him. So don’t text him multiple times a day or call him a lot.

· It’s okay to flirt with other guys in his presence. It may even make him want you back more.

· When you do get back together for a “trial date” be cheerful and friendly but don’t pressure him for more than he can handle.

But, if you have a feeling in your gut that the relationship is over when your boyfriend break up with you, then you need to start moving on.

One of the first things you can do after your boyfriend break up is to sit down and write a long letter to him pouring out your heart. You can talk about the good times and bad. You can tell him what a jerk he is and call him all sorts of names. But, don’t mail the letter! Instead, take a candle out and burn it. This is one of the best ways to get closure after a boyfriend break up.

The next thing you need to do is do a property exchange. Give him back the t-shirt that you love to sleep in. Get the econ textbook you lent him. If there are things like toothbrushes that are too trivial to exchange, throw them away. Don’t have anything around that reminds you of him. If you have gifts that he gave you, box them up for the time being. If you have any money issues to resolve like debts to the other or a joint checking account, get them sorted out.

After you have completed the property exchange, agree that you won’t have any communication for 30 days. This may be hard if you are used to seeing each other on a daily basis, but after a boyfriend break up it is necessary to give yourself some space and distance.

It hurts a lot when a boyfriend break up with you. But it isn’t the end of your life. You can even look at it as a good thing because it means that you are now free to meet your true soul mate.

Of course, you shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that just because you’ve gone through a boyfriend break up that all of the doors are firmly shut. If you think you have a shot of winning him back and that’s something you want, you should by all means take the opportunity to do so.

True love can even survive a boyfriend break up..!.(more....)

Five Most Important Things to Remember About Dating Girls

Everyone does it. Not everyone loves it. Whether you enjoy dating or find it stressful and horrible, you know that if you are ever going to find the one person who can stop your dating life forever, you have to do it. Gentlemen, you simply have to date girls if you are ever going to find the perfect one for you. So, here is some good advice for you.

Successful dating can be broken down into the five most important things about dating girls.They are:

Girls are not guys. They do not think it is fun to make noises by placing their hands under their armpits and acting like a winged creature. Even if they are drunk, they don’t like this. Save this type of behavior for guy’s night.

Girls are not guys. They do not think it is cool to brag about your previous relationship conquests. They do not want to know about the ditzy blonde who had nothing to say but had the most amazing rack ever created. Nor do they think it is great to have their guy greeted by every woman in the place. Take your date to a different place just to be on the safe side and never, never, never mention your ex-girlfriend.

Girls are not guys. They do not like to see you show up at their door in your ratty old jeans with a cheap five-buck pizza in hand. Trust me on this one. Maybe later – way later, like after the kids become teenagers – it will be okay for this kind of thing to happen. But for now, please, guys: take a shower, put on something nice like khakis and a pullover shirt, and have flowers in hand instead of greasy fast food.

Girls are not guys. They do not love it when their date pulls out buy-one-get-one-free coupons at the restaurant cash register. There is nothing wrong with a bargain, especially in these tough economic times, but use those freebies when you go out with your mom (who will love your thriftiness) or your best buddy (who wouldn’t notice or care how you paid). Don’t make your date think that she is not worth full price.

Girls are not guys. They do not find burping and farting contests hilariously interesting and entertaining. Who can come up with most-silent-but-most-deadly one without any prior warning is nothing to be proud of, according to the female half of the population. Neither is it way cool to be able to belch out the melody to “The Star-Spangled Banner.” Again, save it for football night with the frat brothers.

Remembering the five most important things to remember about dating girls will take you farther than anything else when it comes to having a great time on your dates. The five most important things to remember about dating girls will also allow you to get more than one date with the same lady. There are lots of people who will offer you lots of advice about dating, and even some who will simply say, “Be yourself.”

That is not terrible advice, but trust me, if being yourself includes any of the forbidden behavior in the five most important things to remember when dating girls list, don’t be yourself. Be better. Remember these five most important things about dating girls and have a better dating life.!.(more....)

He Dumped Me How Will I Ever Survive

If you are saying "he dumped me. How will I ever survive?" mere words in an article will not give you comfort. It may help to know that while you’ve broken up, you are not a broken person.

When you’ve been in the position that "he dumped me," you have two fears. The first is that you will never recover from the pain. The second is that no one will ever love you again.

Take heart, dear. The fear is real. The pain is real. But, the situation exists in your head, not in the real world. While one part of your life may be over, your life is not over.

You still have friends and family who care about you. In fact, you now have more time to spend with them. Many times, when you get into an involved romantic relationship, we lose touch with the other people who bring meaning to your life. You now have a chance to reconnect with them.

In fact, sharing your loss with them may encourage them to share their break up experiences with you. When you say, "he dumped me," that allows them to be vulnerable about how they've been hurt. You will begin to see that your pain is not unique. You will also be able to see that other people have lived full and complete lives after a break up.

In addition to having more time for others who you care about, you will have more time to work on the issues in your life. Many times, when you are in a relationship, the activities you care about get pushed aside if your boyfriend isn't interested in them. This is a good time to get re-involved in the things that matter to you.

If no particular activity comes to mind, then maybe you need to get a hobby! No, really, when you say "he dumped me," what you tell yourself is that you are worthless. When you take up a new activity and invest in yourself, you prove to yourself that you matter.

There are all kinds of activities you can get involved with. The best thing to do is to join a group, class, or workshop. For instance, joining a hiking club will let you meet lots of people who enjoy the great outdoors. A ballroom dancing class will introduce you to people who enjoy the finer things in life. A writer’s workshop will be filled with creative types.

As you begin to re-engage with the world, you will lose the sense of desperation you felt when he dumped you. You will make new friends who share a common interest. And, you may even meet someone special to spend your time with.

The truth is that you will find someone to date again. Your soul mate is out there.

Your ex may have done you a favor by breaking up with you because now you have a chance to find someone who fits you better.

And, always remember, the best revenge when "he dumped me" is moving on!.(more....)

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

When Love Still Exists How to Win Ex Back

Do you want to win ex back? If you had a close, loving relationship with a man who later dumped you, you may want to get back together. You have a lot of emotional investment in the relationship, and may not want to throw it away without an attempt to reignite the flame. Here’s how to win ex back.

First of all, you need to analyze your own feelings. Do you still care deeply about your ex? Sometimes a great passion burns into being merely comfortable. You don’t want to lose your ex because he’s like an old slipper. But comfort doesn’t make a great relationship. There has to be a great love. If you still have passionate feelings for your old boyfriend, you can move onto the next step of how to win ex back.

And that next step is examining how he feels about you. Does he have the same kind of grand love? If the problems in the relationship were things you can work on – communication, time management, goal awareness – then you can win ex back. But, if the problem was deeper – he was no longer in love with you – you should start to move on now.

When you have determined that this was a grand love, you can start to work on the things that can bring you back together. For instance, think back to who you were when your boyfriend fell for you. Perhaps you weighed 10 pounds less, had a more optimistic outlook on life, were close to your girlfriends, or were involved in a variety of activities.

After you spend time with a guy, you begin to change. You spend less time with girlfriends or on your own activities as he begins to demand more of your presence. You may have let yourself go because you feel secure in his affection.

If you want to win ex back, you need to go back to being the woman he fell in love with.

Another tip to how to win ex back is to practice detachment. Don’t call, text, or stalk him. You don’t want to appear desperate. By seeming to accept the situation, you actually become more desirable to him.

In practicing detachment, you also begin to focus on what makes you happy. You get reconnected to friends and family. You take up hobbies and other things which interest you. You become a more positive person in general. This all helps in win ex back.

When you do get together with your ex from time to time, use the past to your advantage. For instance, if there was an outfit he really liked to see you in, wear it. If you eat at a restaurant where you had a good time with him, mention that you were there again. Because you have many positive experiences with this guy, you can use your common history to win ex back.

From time to time, invite your ex to non-committal type events. Ask him to join a group of your friends at a bar or invite him to a party. Let him know he’s free to bring a date.

Finally, if you want to win ex back, just be yourself. Either he’s in love with you or he isn’t. You can’t change who you are to win ex back. You can only be yourself.(more....)

Want Ex Back – Changing What Went Bad to Get My Ex Back

You are home after a date with yet another guy. It didn’t go well. You find yourself saying I want ex back.

After a break up, you may move on to other people. But, when you constantly find yourself thinking you want ex back, are there things you can do to rekindle an old relationship?

There are, and in this article, I present you with five strategies for when you want ex back.

First, clear your energy from other people. Don’t invest time and energy in men who aren’t your ex. For your old relationship to start working again, you have to prepare your mind, body and soul for him. If you are flirting with another guy, dating other men, or even worse, sleeping around, you are not preparing the proper mindset for getting your ex back

Next, keep your dignity. Don’t chase your ex, flooding him with hundreds of text messages, calling him at odd times of day, or stalking him. Also, you need to make him respect you and treat you well. Don’t be a doormat. You will only command your ex’s respect and love when you are yourself at your best. Hold your head high. You will increase your chances of getting back together with your ex if you do.

Third, make a list of the things you appreciate about your ex and spend some time dwelling on them. Sometimes, a bad break up ends with all kinds of accusations. Now that you have some breathing room, start to concentrate on his good points. This is a good thing to do when you want ex back.

Next, when you get back together, try changing some of the circumstances. Go to new places and try new things. Take up a new hobby together. Meet new people. By changing the environment of your relationship, you have a better chance of making it work. Don’t fall into the same old patterns of your relationship. You may even want to tune your relationship down a notch. If you were living together, try having separate places for a while. If you were engaged, try just dating. Don’t try to force your relationship back into old patterns.

Finally, create a shared sense of destiny. While fate certainly plays a role in our lives, we are the ones who write our life script. Map out with your partner where you want to go. When you do this together, you create a mission with a place for both of you.

When you want ex back, you have to work with new scenarios. Follow the advice in this article if you want ex back..(more....)

Things I ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me

Okay, I’ll admit, I’ve been dumped. More than once. More than I’d like to admit, actually. And, while it hurt quite a bit each time, I have to say that I have grown from the experiences. So, here are some things I’ve learned from women who ve dumped me.

Things I’ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me #1: It takes two.

Often with the pain and heartbreak of a break up, it is easy to blame the other person for your misery. But the truth is that if the relationship was no longer working, you were part of the problem. Evaluate what went on so that you can apply the lessons to your next relationship.

Things I’ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me #2: Give women their personal space.

Women like to cuddle and snuggle. They may seem to always be around. But they need their personal space too. Men have a tendency to be possessive. We want to keep tabs on where they’re going and what they’re doing there. If any woman has ever cheated on you, this instinct becomes stronger. But, trust is a key component in a relationship. When you invade her personal space, you send the message that you don’t trust your girlfriend. This can easily lead to the end of the relationship.

Things I’ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me #3: You get stronger over time.

When you wake up in the morning and the hurt’s so real, you may believe that you will never get over the break up. But the truth is that not only does time heal all pain, but you will emerge from the break up a stronger person. As philosopher Frederick Nietzsche said, “that which doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger.”

Things I’ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me #4: It’s okay if it wasn’t meant to be.

Coming to accept that a relationship wasn’t meant to be is a key factor in healing. If you had started projecting your relationship into the future – considering marriage, thinking about children – and then the woman you were with broke everything off, consider it a blessing. It is better to end a relationship that wasn’t meant to be earlier rather than later.

Things I’ve Learned from Women Who ve Dumped Me #5: Good things don’t happen unless you make them happen.

Finally, the last lesson I want to share with you is that you can’t control what happened, but you can control to how you react to what happened. If you want good things to happen in the future, you have to make them happen.

That means getting back on the horse. Go out, meet new women. Have some fun. Eventually, you will find another relationship. And, if you have followed the advice in this article about things I’ve learned from women who ve dumped me, the relationship will be even better and stronger than the last one.(more....)

I Lost Love – Every Relationship Has a Time Line

When I think about how I lost love, I think about Alfred Lord Tennyson’s quote, “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” When I lost love, I felt the whole world had collapsed around me. I’m sharing my story in order to help you if you too have lost the love of your life.

I think it is important to remember that every relationship has a natural lifespan. In Junior High, that’s about four days. As we get older, the lifespan increases. But, there are certain relationships that are right for a period of time and then go awry. Most of us will only have one great love in our lives. The other relationships will terminate. That’s why when I say I lost love, I understand that this is a natural process.

In my case, my girlfriend and I were thinking about ratcheting up our relationship. Her lease was about to end, and she wanted to move into my apartment. As we were spending most of our time there anyway, it made sense from a financial perspective.

But there is something significant about having separate places. I know I lost love because I couldn’t handle her taking our relationship to this level. I guess the time span of our relationship was up because I wasn’t willing to become more committed.

Now, I know I handled the situation badly. I went to a friend’s bachelor party and let’s just say things got out of hand. Word about the wild antics at the party got back to my girlfriend, naturally, and she dumped me. I lost love over the events of one night.

But, when I think back on what really happened, the events of the bachelor party were really a reaction to our discussion of more commitment. I seriously don’t think I would have behaved the way I did if I really wanted her to move in. I lost love because I wasn’t ready for the direction it was taking.

I’m glad I had the chance to be in a relationship with my ex. But I don’t think she was the love of my life, my soul mate. Instead, she was someone with whom I genuinely enjoyed spending time. I loved her. I still love her. But, she is not the person with whom I see spending the rest of my life.

I went through a period of mourning the relationship and analyzing what went wrong. I really was hurt when she said she wanted to end things. Sure, I understood that I had hurt her. But, I didn’t want her to leave my life completely.

I guess what I wanted was for things to continue on the way they were. But, every relationship has to grow or die. Because I wasn’t willing to let it grow, it had to die. In every relationship, there is a time to die. And, for me, this was it. That’s how I lost love.(more....)

How to Win Love Back With Common Sense

How to win love back is a topic that I want to talk about today. Too many people do this all wrong. They think that they must aggressively pursue their ex in order to get him or her back. In fact, nothing could be further from the truth. If you want to know how to win love back, follow the advice in this article as closely as possible.

The first thing you need to know in the how to win love back arena is that you do not want to chase your ex.

Too many guys think they must pursue their ex’s. They send hundreds of texts, call at odd hours of the day, and even stalk their ex girlfriend’s home. They send flowers and gifts.

This is wrong, wrong, wrong because it makes you look desperate. Women like Alpha males, not sniveling guys they think are jokes. When you appear desperate, your ex girlfriend will start playing head games with you. She’ll let you come over, and then invite a new guy over too. She’ll pretend she’s interested only to go off in another direction.

And, the more you fall into this trap, the more games she’ll play. This is not the answer to how to win love back.

Instead of chasing her and being desperate, you need to play games with her that make her come crawling to you.

When you are in a group that includes her, flirt with every girl but her. If she has an enemy in the group, pay special attention to that girl. By ignoring your ex, you make her want to come back to you. You are reminding her of all of your charms, but not applying them to her.

It’s a good idea to go out on a date with one of her close friends. Send your ex a text message saying “now that we’re just friends, I wanted your opinion on something. Where should I take Mary to dinner after the big game?” That is sure to make your ex girlfriend jealous and it’s one of the tricks for how to win love back.

Even if you don’t want to play head games with your ex, there is one thing that you can do that may help you in the how to win love back arena. That is, you should be happy.

Girls like to date happy guys. If you work on you rather than focus on her, you have a much better chance getting her back.

Go work out at the gym. Hang with your buddies. Get involved in a hobby you never had time for when you were dating her. Go out on dates. Even if you have to fake being happy initially, you will soon realize that you really are happy.

This way, whether you get the girl back or you move on, you will be a happier person.

And, that is my advice for how to win love back.(more....)

How Get Your Ex Back – What To Do When Shes Dumped You

How get your ex back? This is the lament of every guy who has ever been dumped. Did you know that in three quarters of break ups, it is the girl who calls the whole thing off? Guys generally want to stay together with their girlfriends. This article is about how to get ex back.

First of all, you have to determine whether she did you a favor by dumping you. Too often, guys stick with girls out of inertia. It is easier to stay in an okay relationship than go out and look for a really good one. If you don’t feel that the girl who dumped you was your soul mate, consider that her calling things off might be a blessing in disguise.

If this is not the case and you still want get your ex back, read on.

The next step is to determine whether she loves you. Girls can be fickle. They are much more likely to act impulsively and then have regrets about what they did. If you think she still loves you, you have a good chance at ho get your ex back.

In this case, you have to make her come to you. Many guys call their ex’s numerous times, send hundreds of texts, and exhibit other such stalkerish behavior. This just pushes their girlfriends away.

Instead, seem like you are accepting of the break up. Move on. Date other girls – especially girls in her circle. By making her come back to you instead of the other way around, you will go about how get your ex back.

During this time, you should analyze whether you have changed from the many she first fell in love with. Often, guys try to impress girls up front. But, once they have slipped into a comfortable relationship with their girlfriend, they slag off. For instance, are you still working out as often as you did? Toward the end, were you still opening her car door, buying her flowers, and generally romancing her the way you did at the beginning of the relationship? These things can make a big difference in how get your ex back.

When you do see your ex girlfriend, subtly remind her of your common bonds. If you are going to go to a party where you know she’s going to be, wear a shirt she gave you. If she has a favorite cologne, wear it. And, when you talk, bring up the positive things in your past. Don’t beat her over the head with them, but make her nostalgic about your common history.

Invite her to non-committal type of events. If a group of friends are going to the beach, ask her to come along. Begin seeing her in social settings once again. When she comes along, pay some attention to her, but spend your time with your friends and other girls too. When she sees that you are an attractive catch, you’ve already won half the battle of how get your ex back.

So, that is how get your ex back.(more....)

How to Get Over Guy – The Steps for Moving On

Are you having trouble get over guy? Whether he dumped you or you broke up with him, letting go of someone who you had a close relationship is very difficult. There is a space in your heart as well as a space in your life that are not quickly filled with anything or anyone else. Yet, people do get over a relationship. Here are five steps to get over guy you still like.

First, you need to let out the hurt. Know that it is okay to cry when you are trying to get over guy. Some people keep a journal of their experiences because writing about the pain helps.

One thing that I have seen some people do that is very effective is to write a long letter about the relationship to their ex boyfriend. Talk about the good times and bad. Talk about the relationship and how he hurt you. Let it all out. When you have finished the letter, burn it. That’s right. Don’t even think about sending it to your ex. Instead, let flames consume the letter. That provides excellent closure to the relationship.

Next, you have to decide that the relationship is really over. If you hold on to the thought that he will change and come back to you, you will never get over guy and move on.

Do something that symbolizes the finality of the end of the relationship. A good example of this is to exchange all of the personal property that you have of the other’s. Don’t even keep the oversized t-shirt of his that is so comfortable for sleeping in. And, if there are things to minor to exchange (like a toothbrush), throw them away. Clear your place of all of his things. It is a way of clearing him from your life.

You need to depend on your friends through this time. Until you meet your husband, guys will come and go, but your girlfriends are forever. If you have been in a hot and heavy relationship, you may have inadvertently ignored your friends for a time. Not only will your girls help you get over guy, but reconnecting will be good for your social life.

Also, your girlfriends will have had similar experiences to your break up. Sharing their pain will help you understand that, however bad the hurt you are experiencing, others have survived and you will too.

You will probably have extra time on your hands now that you have broken up. You used to spend a lot of time with your ex. Use this time productively to get over guy. Go to the gym and get your body in shape. Take up a new hobby.

One of the best things you can do during this period is to join a group or a class. Not only does a class take up the time you would have spent with your ex, but it also introduces you to a new circle of friends.

And, that brings me to my last point, when you want to get over guy, the best thing you can do is move on. Between your old friends, the new friends you make in your class or hobby, and the activities you do to fill up your time, you will emerge as a new person.

Moving on is the best way to get over guy.(more....)

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Get Guy Back – A Gals Guide to Making Up

How do you get guy back? How do you convince him that what the two of you had together was special? This is your “get guy back” gal’s guide to making up.

First of all, you have to recognize that whatever happened, you were both at fault. If you cheated, he wasn’t giving you what you needed so you looked elsewhere. If he cheated, you were the one not giving what he needed. Yes, the cheater is morally culpable for the cheating. The moral responsibility does not lie with the person who was cheated upon. But the fault lies in both party’s laps.

Given that, it is important to forgive and forget. True forgiveness means that you let go of all of the anger related to the incident. You never bring it up again. You never let it cloud your relationship. If you cannot do this, you won’t get guy back for any period of time.

If you were the person at fault, apologize – and mean it. Too many times, after people say “I’m sorry,” there’s an “Oops I did it again,” moment. You’re not Britney Spears. It’s not cute. When you say you are sorry, you have to commit to changing. Otherwise, you don’t mean it and you won’t get guy back.

Be prepared to chase him a little bit. This doesn’t mean sending him hundreds of text messages or stalking him, but you have got to show him that you are still interested if you want to get guy back. You can’t expect him to come running back just because you have sent out some modest signals that you are ready to re-start the relationship. Put your ego in check and put your heart on the line.

You may have to settle for something less than you wanted. It may be that he is only ready to be friends when you want a full fledged boyfriend. It may take time to rebuild the trust. If this is the case, you need to give him the space he needs to get to know you again. Accept that you have to take what he is offering right now if you want to eventually get guy back.

Finally, you have to know when to give up on the get guy back strategy. Sometimes, you just have to move on. If your boyfriend is unable to forgive you, you are in a position where the best thing you can do is move on and enter into new relationships. While this will break your heart right now, it may be the best thing that could have happened to you. Whatever went wrong in this relationship, your soul mate is still out there. Get guy back may stop you from meeting him!


Get Guy Back – A Gals Guide to Making Up

Tips and Techniques to Get Ex Boyfriend Back

Do you want to get ex boyfriend back? Are you reeling from his desire to call the relationship quits? Do you have an empty place in your heart – and in your life – where he used to be? Here are some tips and techniques to get ex boyfriend back.

First of all, whatever you do, don’t chase him. This means lay off the texts, the phone calls, and the stalking. Don’t just show up where he happens to be. This stalking behavior will just turn him off. He’s got to want to come back to you, not the other way around. That’s the only way to get ex boyfriend back.

Instead of pursuing him, start to work on you. In order to get ex boyfriend back, you need to become a more positive person. You probably have many negative emotions right now including loss and hurt. You need to purge these feelings and get back on a positive note.

One way to do this is to write a long letter to your boyfriend talking about all of the good times you had, all of the hurts you experienced, and all of the things you wished you had told him. Once you have poured your heart out on paper, burn the letter. That’s right. Whatever you do, DON’T SEND THE LETTER. Instead, light a match and watch the flame consume the paper. This will give you some closure to that portion of the relationship.

After you have burned the letter, eliminate all negativity from your life. Don’t let your girlfriends talk badly about your ex. And, to the extent possible, be positive about your whole life.

When you do think about the relationship, remember what made it strong. Think about the good times you had. If you do occasionally talk to your ex, bring up the positive experiences and avoid fighting about the issues that ended it. If you want to get ex boyfriend back, you have to remind him what was good about the relationship.

To this end, focus your energy working on your strengths. For instance, if your boyfriend always praised you on being a good cook, take a gourmet cooking class. Get even better at the things you are good at.

But don’t neglect your weaknesses either. If your ex complained about how you were a slob, start picking things around the house. Make an effort to become a better person if you want to get ex boyfriend back.

Finally, you should be available – to him and others. If someone asks you out on a date, accept it. You don’t have to be head over heals in love with a guy to go out to dinner with him.

As your ex sees you as a desirable catch, he’s going to want to get back into your life. By focusing on the positive and working on your strengths and weaknesses, you are sure to get ex boyfriend back.


Tips and Techniques to Get Ex Boyfriend Back

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Dealing With My Break Up – Caused Break Up Pain

Dealing with break up pain, any way that you look at it, is not going to be an easy or enjoyable task. A

lot of people incorrectly believe that they will be able to manage their heartbreak, only to find out

that carrying a torch for someone after a love affair is a lot like grieving, at least if you look at

the relationship as having passed on. When it comes to dealing with a broken intimate relationship, it

is important that you look past the pain and find a way to survive even when things seem impossible for

the time being.

Relationship breakup puts a lot of people through fear and misery. Some of the people going through

these feelings have no one in the world to turn to, and this is why people suffer so hard from

heartbreak in the first place. Dealing with break up pain all by yourself can seem impossible at first,

but consider how many people deal with love and loss in their lives and survive to talk about it. You

too will be able to get over what feels like a crippling break up, but only if you are willing to deal

with heartbreak pain the right way, and the healthy way for that matter.

So why is the pain from a lost love break up so difficult? Because when dealing with a break up, it will

seem as if you are the only one who has suffered the kind of pain you’re going through. It is important

that you continue to try to heal rather than allowing yourself to give up on the situation. Dwelling on

the painful split from your lover will not help you, so instead you should work on getting better and

moving on, which will allow you to stop dealing with break up pain and start dealing with moving on and

finding someone new, perhaps even someone that has a better dynamic with you.

* Spend time with your friends and let them help you get your mind off your heartbreak.

* Don't dwell on the bad feelings, but focus on the good parts of your life in order to promote healing.

Your friends will probably realize that you're going through something serious, and they will more than

likely dedicate themselves to trying to help you through it. If this is the case, don't blow them off,

because going out and spending time with your friends and the people that you care about will be

extremely helpful when it comes to dealing with break up pain. Everyone goes through a period where they

are dealing with break up pain, because everyone goes through a breakup. Rather than allow yourself to

suffer while dealing with breaking up pain, what you should do is enjoy yourself and work on healing

rather than allowing yourself to become stressed out, overwhelmed or depressed by your heartbreak.


Dealing With My Break Up – Caused Break Up Pain

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Can I Save My Marriage – Its Up To You

It is depressing to see many marriages that are in turmoil, and it is especially disconcerting to see them end up as messy divorces, so you may ask how can I save my marriage? Filing for divorce is not the solution for when a marriage has hit its pushing limits. There are a number of solutions that require that both partners to be fully committed in saving the relationship that they have. The first step is counseling, which enables the couple to have a mediator in dealing with their issues.

In addition to professional services, there are a number of different things that can be done to save a marriage, it is not a complicated process and does not require much outside of both parties working towards the common goal. Below are four things that you can take to heart and utilize to "save my marriage" and improve the odds of successfully avoiding divorce.

First, know that the perfect marriage is a myth. Whenever two people are brought together, there will be problems, including the few that can grow into deal breakers in your marriage. This is a natural result of bringing two people together. Even perfect twins differ in likes and dislikes. For the marriage to succeed, the couple must learn to deal with the rough patches and overcome their problems. Seeking perfection will only destroy everything. People make mistakes, work with your partner and overcome the problems you face, and you'll realize it is possible to "save my marriage."

Second, good communication is vital, for when the communication is insufficient; the marriage is doomed to face problems. The most vital thing is to be honest with your partner. Just about every issue and problem can be solved if communication is maintained. The third tip is to accept compromise. Many have made this an art, with good reason. The middle ground that will enable a conclusion to the conflict has to mesh with both parties and their interests before it can "save my marriage." Marriage on a whole is about compromise and knowing that there are times when your spouse will have to give and times when you have to give in order to "save my marriage."

Really, a marriage is about commitment, the fourth tip. Like a car, if it breaks down, you don't abandon the car on the side of the road. The only time you do get rid of the car is when there is no hope. Saving your marriage involves the same level of commitment and working towards making things work, if you ever have a chance to "save my marriage."

Sometimes, the damage to the marriage totals it, and no matter what you do, nothing can change it. Some issues cannot be solved, counseling cannot help. It is in these cases that divorce makes sense. Out side of these cases, divorce is not the answer. Instead, you should work with your partner to solve the issues that plague your marriage, and hopefully you will be able to say that you can "save my marriage."


Can I Save My Marriage – Its Up To You

Friday, January 9, 2009

Taking Steps To Get Girl Back

When you’ve broken up with someone you care about you have a hard time thinking of anything but how to get girl back. If you truly want this to happen, you’ll probably have to make some changes. Whatever happened to cause the break up should be looked at. Was it something you did, or didn’t do? Is it something that you can still fix, or is it too late?

If it was something you did or didn’t do and you can fix it now, then fix it. Undo something, or do something you should have done already. Apologize and make amends. This alone might not get girl back, but it’s the first step on the path to getting her back. If whatever happened can’t be fixed, then at the very least make sure she knows that you’re sorry and that you'd change what happened if you could.

Now that you’ve moved past what caused the break up, the next step to get girl back is to make her want you back. That sounds like common sense, but so many people don’t do it. If the relationship ended with her angry, then you have to show her the you that makes her happy again. You’re going to have to be especially patient and forgiving. Be as sweet as you can possibly be when you talk to her or see her.

Even if you’re angry at the time or you feel far from happy, at least show her the most pleasant side of yourself you can. Make her remember your good qualities and what she liked about you when you were happy. If she feels you have truly apologized for what caused the break up and she sees your sweet side again, you might be able to get girl back.

It’s important to pay close attention when you see or talk to her. Listen carefully and don’t interrupt. Let her express herself without jumping in and telling her how she ought to feel or what she ought to do. You won’t get girl back by trying to boss her around!

You also need to pay close attention to see if your efforts are having an effect. Sometimes you can see that she’s softening to you. She talks nicer when she sees you, and you have been seeing her more often. Maybe she even seeks you out more often than she did before. Or she seeks you out now after ignoring you for a long time. Your efforts to get girl back are working!

Because she’s so impressed with how sweet you are, she wants to be around you more. And that only reminds her why she wanted to be with you in the first place. Pay careful attention also if you suddenly stop seeing her as much as before, or she becomes distant or angry talking when you see her. That’s a good sign that you’re pushing and she’s uncomfortable. Take a break and you’ll have a better chance to get girl back.


Taking Steps To Get Girl Back

Avoiding A Love Break Up

If you’ve ever had your love break up you know how painful it is. And if you thought back after the relationship ended, you probably saw all the signs that you didn’t recognize before. If you’ll remember those signs and keep them in mind, they can help you prevent a break up in the future. And they can also help you get back together after a split.

One sure sign of impending love break up is the lack of physical contact. This doesn’t just mean sex. If your partner suddenly stops having an interest in sex, that’s a good sign that a break up is coming. But the normal flow and rhythm of a relationship has times when there’s lots of sex and times when there’s not much. This is natural.

A love break up is probably on the horizon though, if your partner stops holding your hand for no apparent reason. Or he or she stops putting an arm over your shoulder at the movies or in public when he or she always did it before. Any sudden changes like not touching you much outside the bedroom when your partner was always very affectionate before could signal problems.

If it goes beyond not touching to the person actually becoming uncomfortable at your touch, then you definitely need to have a conversation with your partner about what’s going on. Don’t just assume that because your partner flinched away from your touch that there’s about to be a love break up, though. Many things can cause a person to not want to be touched at any given moment.

A person might have been thinking of something else and been surprised or startled by the touch. He or she might think that your touch signals that it’s time to have sex, if you’re not very affectionate except when you want to be intimate. And maybe your partner isn’t in the mood for sex now and chose to show you that by moving away from your touch. That doesn’t mean you’re headed for a love break up.

Your partner might simply not feel good. Every change in a person’s behavior doesn’t signal an impending love break up or even anything wrong with the relationship. You have to watch them closely for a while to determine if some behavior is an occasional thing, something brought on only during certain times, or if it’s a permanent part of the person’s make up.

Catching your partner in lies, even what seem like small and harmless ones, could be a sign of problems, too. After all, if a lie is small and harmless, why tell it in the first place? Where there’s one tiny lie, larger and more damaging lies can grow. Don’t become convinced it’s a love break up right away though. People lie about many things that aren’t bad, like surprise parties and reunions. Your partner might be trying to keep a harmless and fun secret like that, instead of scheming about a love break up.


"Avoiding A Love Break Up"

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Your Moving On The Break Up Is Over

Sometimes moving on (break up, loss or other major change) is difficult. It’s rarely easy unless you’re so glad to get out of a situation that you can’t wait to make changes and move on. A break up disrupts your whole life. Everything you do and see seems to remind you of your ex. If you had many mutual friends, even going out to keep from going stir crazy can be difficult.

One of the biggest hurdles you have to face when you’re ready to move on is your family and friends. If your ex was popular with your family, you’re going to get tired of questions about the situation. You must explain to them that you’re moving on, break up is over, and that you don’t appreciate constantly being reminded of your ex and the past relationship.

Sometimes this is difficult for family to deal with. They want to keep bringing up the person in the hopes that you’ll get back together. You can just explain, “Moving on, break up is over, that’s that.” Eventually they’ll come around because they’re your family and they love you. It’s probably going to be harder to deal with when it comes to your friends.

If you didn’t have many mutual friends, then it should be less of a problem. But if the two of you often hung out with the same group of people, then you going alone to be with those friends is going to seem strange to everyone for a while. And then there’s the problem of your ex wanting to hang out with the friends, too. You might even run into each other as you each attempt to hang out with your mutual friends. This doesn’t mean that it’s necessary when you’re moving on break up with your friends. It’s just simply going to be more difficult to maintain some of those friendships once the relationship is over.

As difficult as it seems, when you say, “Moving on, break up is history,” you may have to give up some of those friendships. You and your ex may each have to keep in touch with only certain friends in your group of mutual friends. Just try to maintain good contact and relationships with those you’re closest to and allow your ex to do the same with the others. While this can be painful, it’s probably easiest on everyone because they don’t have to choose which of you to be loyal to and which to avoid.

Sometimes the “moving on break up” period is just too difficult when you’re surrounded by mutual friends and so many places to go together. If possible, go on a vacation to get away from the same scenery and people. Take a vacation with a friend who isn’t involved in the situation; maybe a friend of yours who wasn’t friends with your ex. This can help you get some perspective. Once you’ve declared, “moving on; break up over” then if you can take some time away it can help you a great deal.


Your Moving On The Break Up Is Over

Monday, January 5, 2009

Stop Divorce and Save Your Relationship

If you want to stop divorce, you have to convince the person what wants to divorce you to give the relationship another try. This isn’t always possible, but it’s absolutely necessary if you have a chance of stopping a divorce. A divorce can be stopped at virtually any stage—before it’s filed or just before it needs the final paperwork. The earlier you stop a divorce, the more likely it is that the divorce won’t be restarted, at least not anytime soon.

So to stop a divorce, you must convince the person to give the relationship another chance. If you have been begging the other person to give you another try or pleading for them to get back together with you, stop now. This might seem counterproductive, as if now that the person has less resistance it will make it easier for them to divorce you. But your pleading probably wasn’t doing anything but convincing them that divorce is a good idea anyway. Who wants to be around someone who is behaving that way?

If you can start acting more mature and behave in a more pleasant manner, it might surprise the other person and help stop divorce. Explain that you really don’t want the divorce and you want another chance in a calm way. The person already knows this so you screaming or carrying on won’t help your chances. Just make it clear that you’re hurt and very sad, and you really want another chance. You might be surprised how the other person reacts when you change your behavior.

You can also show a mature side of yourself that the other person might not have seen over the last several weeks and suggest marital or couples counseling to stop divorce. Counseling has worked for million of couples and your relationship could benefit from it, too. If you can get the other person to agree to couples counseling, then you have precious time before they file for or attempt to finalize a divorce to convince them to give you and the relationship another chance.

During counseling you’ll have the opportunity to show the person why they fell in love with you. You can remind them why you’re together in the first place. And if you can show honest effort in wanting to deal with the problems that come up during the counseling—and many probably will—that might be enough to convince the other person not only to stop divorce temporarily, but permanently.

When you succeed and stop divorce, you must remember that the person was about to divorce you and it would be easy enough for them to change his or her mind and file for divorce later. Having already thought about divorce and maybe even having gone far enough as to file for divorce at one time makes the decision to file again easier. So be aware of the state of your relationship, and perhaps continue counseling. It’s easier to stop divorce temporarily than to have a good relationship for the long term.


Stop Divorce and Save Your Relationship

Im Still In Love My Ex May Not Be

You might say, “I’m still in love, my ex isn’t.” This is a difficult situation. First of all, you don’t really know that your ex is not still in love with you, too. Your ex may have claimed to not love you anymore, and that’s possible. But it’s also possible that he or she still harbors feelings for you. Many couples who still love each other very much break up for other reasons.

If you can honestly say, I’m still in love my ex, there’s a good chance your ex might still love you. But that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a good idea to try to get back together. You broke up for a reason. Even if you didn’t want to break up and the break off was entirely your ex’s doing, really think hard about things. It’s rare that a person can’t think back and see reasons why the break-up might be for the best. It isn’t always easy right at first when you’re still in so much pain from the break-up, but with time you’ll probably see that the break-up might even be good for you.

If the break-up was mutual and now you’re having a hard time because you feel “I’m still in love, my ex should be here with me,” then it’s even more important that you examine why you agreed to the break-up in the first place. Yes, there is a chance that a mutual split was a mistake. But if you’ll really look back at the reasons you both had for calling a halt to the relationship, you might find that’s better to love your ex from afar and work through the sadness rather than try to rekindle the romance.

“I’m still in love; my ex even wants to get back together.” While this might make you feel very hopeful that the two of you might be able to work things out and live happily ever after, don’t be fooled into thinking that it will be easy. The reasons you broke up are still there. If you get back together, what will change? Your relationship might go along well for a while because you’re both so happy to be back together.

If you broke up thinking, I’m still in love my ex, and he or she thought the same so you got back together, you’ll go through a honeymoon period just as you did when you were a new couple. You’ll both feel like you saved the relationship and kept each other from making a horrible mistake. But that feel-good honeymoon period will wear off eventually. And then what will you do?

How are you going to prevent the problems that caused you to break up in the first place from coming back and making you want to part ways again? Couples counseling is a good option. If you think, “I’m still in love my ex and want him or her back,” then consider counseling to keep old problems from splitting you up again later.


Im Still In Love My Ex May Not Be

Saturday, January 3, 2009

How To Get Over Someone You Love

If you want to know how to get over someone you love, you must realize that none of the answers are easy ones. No matter how ready you might think you are to move on and get over that person, that you have to ask how to do it at all shows that it’s going to be a painful process. Sometimes it’s a slow process, too. You might think you’re over someone and a year or two later be reminded of that person and feel all the pain and sadness again. That doesn’t mean you’re not over the person, though.

If you’ve had a lot emotionally invested into a relationship and it ends, it’s something that can potentially make you feel sad for years. Maybe even for the rest of your life. But that doesn’t mean the sadness has to be paralyzing or has to throw you into a depression. By getting over the person, you can realize that losing them made you sad, and look back on it as you would any sad loss. It’s the period of time soon after the loss that should be the hardest, that makes you ask how to get over someone you love.

If the break-up is new, often the only way to deal with it is just to face the pain and ride it out. It’s going to hurt, no matter what you do. But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain. You can remove obvious visual reminders of the person, if possible. Photographs of them can be put away for a while. Gifts they gave you can be stored instead of displayed. You can even avoid the places you used to go together for a while. This tip can be found in pretty much every list that explains how to get over someone you love, so it’s at least a popular idea that’s worth a try.

If you’re really having trouble living your life after the break-up, it might be necessary to seek counseling. Simply explain that you’ve just been through a painful break-up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. They can offer helpful advice, and can be more specific that generic lists about how to get over someone you love. A counselor can also probably offer better advice than friends or family.

Your friends and family might feel they know your situation too well. Some may have motives for help you get over the person. They might not have liked that you were in the relationship to begin with, so they might want you to get over things or move on to another person too quickly. With a counselor, though, you can safely tell them things about the relationship you probably don’t want friends or family to even know.

Feel free to go to counseling for as long as you need to. If the counselor feels you’re spending too much time dwelling on how to get over someone you love, they’ll tell you.

Get Your Partner To Agree To Relationship Counseling

Relationship counseling is often a last resort for couples on the brink of the divorce. But some couples try counseling early on when the first problems rear their heads. Counseling is certainly something that a couple shouldn’t be afraid to try, even if the problems are relatively minor. Often, catching small problems early with counseling can prevent bigger problems down the road. Early counseling can even something prevent a future divorce.

Today’s couples seem more eager to try to new things, which makes counseling a good option. Couples married years ago seem less likely to go for counseling or try new approaches, perhaps because it wasn’t something commonly done when they were younger. Very often marriages of 30 or 40 years now end in divorce, which is a shame because they’ll never know if relationship counseling could have helped save the marriage.

If you feel like you need relationship counseling, be sure to as your partner to go to counseling with you in a non-judgmental way. If you ask him or her to go to counseling in such a way as it seems like you are accusing them of being the problem and needing counseling, you’re likely to encounter resistance to the idea. Try to make it clear that you want the counseling for yourself if nothing else.

If you ask your partner to go to counseling because you have some issues you need to work on, they’re more likely to view the idea favorably. Explain that you think you need some help to be able to contribute more to the relationship, and to learn how to be a better partner or spouse. Don’t accuse the other person of need counseling. Even if you believe that they are most of the problem, don’t say so. Once you’re in relationship counseling, they will learn tips and techniques for being better within the relationship, just as you will.

Don’t be afraid to suggest relationship counseling, whether you’ve been in the relationship for 3 months, 3 years or two decades. It’s never too late to try counseling to resolve problems. And it’s never too late to try to keep small problems from becoming big ones. If the relationship is relatively new, you might think that you’re admitting to problems and admitting that the relationship is rocky by suggesting counseling. But that’s not true. But facing any obstacles now, you’re making the relationship stronger in the long run.

If your partner believes that your suggestion of relationship counseling means that the relationship isn’t perfect, and maybe even is doomed, calmly explain that that isn’t true. Just because you’re willing to admit that everything is perfect shows that you’re willing to make necessary changes to keep the other person and yourself happy.

If your partner refuses, go on your own. While the counseling would work best if both of you go, you can go and work on things to improve yourself. If your partner sees you going to relationship counseling, they’re more likely to give it a try.

Heartbroken Poem To Help You Heal

If you’ve ever been through a sad break-up with someone you’ve love, you may have written a heartbroken poem. You may have even written such a poem for things like the loss of a pet or a family member, sadness at moving away from your friends, or any number of sad life events. But it seems nothing inspires such sad poetry as a break-up or divorce. Just as few things inspire love poetry quite like being in a happy, loving relationship.

Poetry is an excellent medium for self-expression. Unless you’re writing poetry with the hope of having it published one day, you can write poetry however you like. It doesn’t have to be good poetry. You don’t have to understand any of the poetic terms or conventions like rhyme, meter or free verse. You don’t even have to have ever read a really good poem in your life to write a heartbroken poem that can help you feel better and maybe help you heal from the pain of a break-up.

An important early step in getting over a break-up or any sad situation is simply facing the pain. While it might feel better to avoid dealing with the reality of the situation, you can’t really move past it without facing it and feeling the pain, at least for a while. So facing up to whatever painful situation is happening is necessary. A heartbroken poem can help you deal with those painful feelings when you’ve split with someone you love.

Don’t worry about whether it’s good or not. No one else ever has to read your heartbroken poem. It’s for you and you alone. Just write down your feelings, as hard as that may be. You can write in plain language. Don’t try to imitate the poets of the 17th and 18th century. Write like you talk, and break the lines where it feels natural to you. In fact, you can start by writing one huge paragraph filled with all your feelings and everything you want to express, just to get it out. Then you can go back and arrange your thoughts and feelings into a poem.

Once you’ve written a heartbroken poem, you might want to write more about different parts of the pain. That’s good. Get down everything you can, and that will help you to face the pain. Writing the poetry will probably be a very emotional time for you. Don’t try to stop it. Just let the pain out and you’ll be better able to move on.

If you decide you want to share your heartbroken poem, you can show family or friends. Or if you want to share it but not with anyone you know, you can put it online. There are websites designed just for such things. You can upload your poetry for free and let other people know if you want to receive criticism or not. You might opt to not receive comments on your heartbroken poem and just enjoy the fact that you’ve shared your experience.